Bullying in Hawaii: A State of Denial

183
58572
article top

BY SYDNEY ROSS SINGER – Does the Aloha State actually have a bullying problem? If you are Caucasian and from the Mainland, you will certainly think so.

It doesn’t matter how long you live here, or if you were even born here. If you are white, locals will still call you a “haole”, a derogatory term that is Hawaii’s equivalent of using the “N-word”.

inline

And the prejudice goes beyond name calling. White people are often treated with scorn. “Go back to where you came from”, seems to be the message. “You don’t belong here.” Sometimes it results in violence.

White children in our schools are harassed, intimidated, and physically abused. The last school day of the year in Hawaii, for example, is traditionally called “kill a haole day”.

Racism is as ugly in Hawaii as anywhere else, and is the cause of much of the bullying of school children and adults alike. Unless this underlying racist cause of bullying is addressed, efforts to stop bullying are doomed to fail.

To overcome racism we must be inclusive and tolerant of differences. The diversity of cultures and peoples must be embrace and celebrated to find synergy in our differences. We must realize that we are all “one”, with no group more important than any other.

Achieving this “melting pot” in Hawaii will be difficult. Language and cultural barriers are keeping people apart, making Hawaii more a patchwork of different cultures than an integrated whole.

If these different cultures were living together, say, in New York, then they would all be called New Yorkers. They would share an identity despite their differences. But you can’t do that in Hawaii, since no matter how long you live here you will never be a “Hawaiian”. That term is reserved for native Hawaiian people. Everyone else is just a “resident”.

Being native or not is an issue in Hawaii, and is a racial issue by definition. And while many native Hawaiians live with aloha, there are some who are resentful of what they see as foreign occupation of their islands.

If Hawaiians have first claim to these islands, then locals with Hawaiian blood have second claim, and immigrants, or aliens, have little or no claim. The stage is thus set for prejudice, racism, and bullying.

Of course, when alien people and cultures move in, they bring along alien plants and animals, too. Hawaii’s diversity of species from all around the world is a direct product of human immigration.

It is no surprise, then, that prejudice against immigrant cultures will result in prejudice against immigrant species.

The Hawaii government’s environmental policy gives preference to “native” species and has the agenda of “restoring native ecosystems”. While this native species supremacism is a national agenda, it has a powerful impact in Hawaii where it parallels political nativism and encourages racial prejudice.

According to this policy, species introduced to Hawaii after western contact are “alien”, and “don’t belong here”. Species introduced to Hawaii by native Hawaiians are “native”, and do belong here. The current focus of environmental management is to get rid of immigrant species to return the islands to their pre-contact “native” condition.

To those who desire and appreciate these immigrant species, this feels like environmental bullying.

Of course, this reinforces the racism problem. The more the government institutionalizes native supremacism in political and environmental agendas, the more it justifies and encourages a “we belong here and you don’t” attitude.

This is the recipe for hate, intolerance, and bullying.

For Hawaii to live up to its Aloha Spirit rhetoric, racial bullying must stop being tolerated.  The school anti-bullying program must address racial prejudice.  And there needs to be sensitivity classes to teach compassion and respect for others.

We must realize that what counts most about people is not where they are from, but what they have to offer.  Remember, “Aloha” means compassion, love, peace, affection, and mercy.

Comments

comments

bottom

183 COMMENTS

  1. i live in hawaii for 3 years and it is true about the hate for whites. Cut the crap They are two faced. just heard about Freddy Rice case thank god. It time for everyone in Hawaii to understand that anyone who lives in Hawaii a state of the United States of America should have equal rights. if your Hawaii so what get over it. Move on! They are all inbreeds already. Make it like any other state.

    • What your in hawaii for 3 years and u talk like that about us Hawaiians

      well kimo if that is your name I don’t think your accurate on what u say

      Not all Hawaiians are bad but at the same time I don’t think any hawaiian

      Can listen to any one that only lived here for 3 years

    • What your in hawaii for 3 years and u talk like that about us Hawaiians

      well kimo if that is your name I don’t think your accurate on what u say

      Not all Hawaiians are bad but at the same time I don’t think any hawaiian

      Can listen to any one that only lived here for 3 years

  2. To all who were bullied and feared for your lives I am sorry to hear that. As a parent my son was bullied by a child on the mainland who has family and learning problems. I asked the teacher to handle the matter repeatedly. She only told me this boy had family issues. I asked her to get him to stop or explain to me why she was not taking action. She refused to answer. To make matters worse this boy was 8 and my son 6, he outweighed my son by nearly double his weight. I even reached out to the boy by going to school and having lunch with my sons class on a weekly basis and including him. He responded when I was there and I felt we were making progress. However when I left the bullying continued under the teachers supervision. She viewed it as kids being kids and the bully could not help himself. With such a view I warned the teacher that I would teach my son self defense if she would not handle the matter. She told me if I did, she would take action against my son. I immediately consulted with my attorney who is a decorated war veteran, he and I agreed that what was best for my son was to be able to handle this matter himself. I taught him self defense and he whipped this punk and one of his friends. The bully did not come to school for over a week after the event. The teacher attempted to take action against my son, but my attorney landed on the school immediately, she relented. We were proactive, however my son was hurt that he had to hurt another child for him to stop. Shortly after the incident there was a shooting at a school a couple of states away. The catalyst was bullying, the student took the matter of resolving bullying in his own hands. It emphasized to me, we must find a better way to address bullying in school. Kill is a strong word! Kill Haole day whether used euphemistically or not should be addressed decisively by Educators foremost and parents of children who are participating in such a day. Decisive action must be taken against any and all who participate and against educators who turn a blind eye to such hatred. We should not leave such matters to our children to resolve.

    To all the good Hawaiian people I have visited your beautiful islands 9 times. Thank you for sharing and your wonderful hospitality while we there. You have every right to preserve your culture, remember your ancestors and enjoy the land. As the world grows in poplulation and the ability to travel grows as well, there will be new and continuing challenges. We can only meet them together if we are proactive by educating others. We must enforce laws against those who harm others wrongfully! For those who want America to leave, maybe we should. However remember this, there are other countries that will come to Hawaii to claim it as their own, many who will not be benevolent to the people there. In your harbor sets defenses that will protect your island not by tolerance of other nations destroying or having "kill hawaiians day" rather they will die for your interests. The people in those baracks are not bullys, (if they were there would be no natives) nor are they passive about protecting your rights, our rights! We are a nation that seeks to be a family that is tolerant of others. We have failed one another in this regard in the past. I hope we all will make a resolve not to raise our children in ignorance and bigotry against any race. If you have grown up as a former bully please put away such hatred and work to heal others by teaching your children to bedifferent. If not, history has taught us that this fight will reach our doors with sad consequences for everyone.

    • I am sorry for what happened to your son. Bullying happens everywhere but it is very prevalent here in Hawaii and if you have not lived here and only have visited you cannot begin to understand.

    • Typical mainlander response: "If it weren't us, somebody else would be treating you worse."

      Tell me, who are these "less free" countries that would do this? Japan? Great Britain? Japan was actually supportive of a soverign Hawaii and even sent battleships in response to the US navy being there. As for Great Britain, they couldn't care less either. By the way, these countries also have the same basic freedoms that the US has and while they do treat the indigenous people of their regions (Ainu, Okinawins, Scots, and Irish) like shit, the US does the same with Native Americans.

      Chances are Hawaii would end up like Kiribati or Tuvulu. It wouldn't be the wealthiest nation out there, but at least they'd have their way of life and wouldn't be second class citizens in their own country.

      • Typical islander overconfidence. Imperial Japan would have abused your people in ways you cannot fathom and then the Soviets would have stripped you of any culture and property you had left. Welcome to the real world the rest of us have been living in. Be thankful you have most of what you had. Most Haoles came from cultures that had to fight, flee, resettle over and over. You have it good, so don't hate. Have a nice day.

  3. To all who were bullied and feared for your lives I am sorry to hear that. As a parent my son was bullied by a child on the mainland who has family and learning problems. I asked the teacher to handle the matter repeatedly. She only told me this boy had family issues. I asked her to get him to stop or explain to me why she was not taking action. She refused to answer. To make matters worse this boy was 8 and my son 6, he outweighed my son by nearly double his weight. I even reached out to the boy by going to school and having lunch with my sons class on a weekly basis and including him. He responded when I was there and I felt we were making progress. However when I left the bullying continued under the teachers supervision. She viewed it as kids being kids and the bully could not help himself. With such a view I warned the teacher that I would teach my son self defense if she would not handle the matter. She told me if I did, she would take action against my son. I immediately consulted with my attorney who is a decorated war veteran, he and I agreed that what was best for my son was to be able to handle this matter himself. I taught him self defense and he whipped this punk and one of his friends. The bully did not come to school for over a week after the event. The teacher attempted to take action against my son, but my attorney landed on the school immediately, she relented. We were proactive, however my son was hurt that he had to hurt another child for him to stop. Shortly after the incident there was a shooting at a school a couple of states away. The catalyst was bullying, the student took the matter of resolving bullying in his own hands. It emphasized to me, we must find a better way to address bullying in school. Kill is a strong word! Kill Haole day whether used euphemistically or not should be addressed decisively by Educators foremost and parents of children who are participating in such a day. Decisive action must be taken against any and all who participate and against educators who turn a blind eye to such hatred. We should not leave such matters to our children to resolve.

    To all the good Hawaiian people I have visited your beautiful islands 9 times. Thank you for sharing and your wonderful hospitality while we there. You have every right to preserve your culture, remember your ancestors and enjoy the land. As the world grows in poplulation and the ability to travel grows as well, there will be new and continuing challenges. We can only meet them together if we are proactive by educating others. We must enforce laws against those who harm others wrongfully! For those who want America to leave, maybe we should. However remember this, there are other countries that will come to Hawaii to claim it as their own, many who will not be benevolent to the people there. In your harbor sits defenses that will protect your island not by tolerance of other nations destroying or having "kill hawaiians day" rather they will die for your interests. The people in those baracks are not bullys, (if they were there would be no natives) nor are they passive about protecting your rights, our rights! We are a nation that seeks to be a family that is tolerant of others. We have failed one another in this regard in the past. I hope we all will make a resolve not to raise our children in ignorance and bigotry against any race. If you have grown up as a former bully please put away such hatred and work to heal others by teaching your children to be different. If not, history has taught us that this fight will reach our doors with sad consequences for everyone.

  4. The bullying is so bad here and no one seems to care. When we bring up bullying we are called racist. I have a now five year old who started kindergarten at a school in Ewa Beach and the bullying was so bad that he feared for his life at age four. He was told he could not play with the other children because he was white by his peers and when he would tell his teacher she would do nothing. It then progressed to him being pushed, hit, kicked, and spit on just for being white. The school would do nothing. The final straw was when he came home terrified because one of his classmates said he was going to bring his dad's gun to school and kill him because he was white. My son being threatened like this occurred for a week and every single day I was in the office talking to the principle or vice principle because his teacher did not care (she said she did but NEVER addressed the threats and just brushed them off as kids being kids). When my son told them who was threatening him the administration told my four year old that it did not happen and that he was making it up. Ya ok NOT my son sees in black and white because he has Asperger's. Requested a GE to go to another school that had more a cultural mix and the principle refused to release my son. He's been out of public school for months now and still has nightmares about what happened. It is heart breaking to know that four months of public school has left a lasting negative effect on a child. My husband and I have lived in Hawaii for over 12 years, but never thought we would have these kinds of issues in today's day and age. We got our son into an amazing private school but he is TERRIFIED to go this fall because he's afraid he'll be killed at school for being white. No tell me we don't have a problem here?!?! Before he started school he didn't differentiate race only that everyone is different in one way or another but we are all humans. I have many local friends who are amazing, but those few that are still extremely racist and blame everything on what some did decades ago (not excusing the taking of Hawaii, but where would this state be without being part of the US?) does not mean take it out on everyone who is different. For my son's safety I want to leave Hawaii but cannot because of the military. My whole family is here, I wasn't born here but I was raised here and love Hawaii. Why not move forward and teach future generations (including this one) that all people are equal and to treat EVERYONE REGARDLESS OF RACE the same way they want to be treated.

    • My son has had the same issues at Fern elementary school. He also has aspergers syndrome, adhd, and is white. He started telling me that his 1 on 1 skills trainer hit him when they were in the halls, and that other kids were calling him stupid haole.. I've lived here all my life, i'm caucasian with a portuguese mother… who is also prejudiced to white people. i was picked on and tormented in school because i'm so caucasian looking. stupid haole, f-ing haole. i was alienated, spit on, pushed, bullied. . . as for my son, the kids bullied him relentlessly. he'd come home with tattered clothes and scrapes and bruises. when i brought it up to the school, they say it was just kids playing. they pushed my son into the streets, into oncoming traffic on busy middle street… school still did nothing to address the issue. they would always point out that it was my sons fault, my sons doing? i dont think so. he was a 50 lb kid being harassed by kids nearly double his size. one day, they pushed my son into the corner of the sidewalk, his face was smashed, ripped lip, scraped, and bloody nose. the school didnt even tell me this happened… i saw when i picked him up from school! the neglect astounded me along with their refusal to tell me exactly what happened. i tried to get him accepted by G.E. into another school, as even police that were called in on one incident told me there's a lot of racism going on… My son was refused entry into the other school. My next course of action was to not let him go to Fern, at all. They called me and threatened to take leagal action against me for educational neglect if i didnt put him back in fern.. i told them he's not safe, and they are not complying with standards to provide a SAFE LEARNING ENVIRONMENT. My sons confidence was horrible, calling himself 'stupid' 'f-ggot' 'dumb haole' and more. I was forced to put him back in fern school… and i kept a more watchful eye. One day i get a call and the principal admitted she hit him. THE PRINCIPAL HIT MY SON. She claims it was on the shoulder, my son says it was on his face. There was no physical mark left, but there was another emotional mark scarring him to think he is a terrible person. why such hatred towards him? I am now home-schooling him. I do not feel i am doing a great job educating him, as his learning styles are difficult to tap, however he is OBVIOUSLY more self confident and happier than when he was in public school. It is sad that he cannot even play outside, as we have moved to Aiea, but he gets bullied everywhere. The result of bullying and racism towards me, has turned me to a virtual hermit. too afraid to show my white face outside, too afraid to wear shorts or short sleeved clothes because i'm so white. So many turn a blind eye to racism in hawaii because its hard to believe… not for me. i see it every day. seen it all my life.

  5. Hawaii has earned it's reputation. What you see really is what you get…The example that Hawaiian's live in embracing other cultures is the closest we'll ever get to a racial ideal. Racism might rear its ugly head occassionaly but is neither frequent enough nor serious in its manifestation for it to be an issue here. The vast mixture of various ethnic groups present here evidences this. Whites are indeed included in that picture from my vantage point as a Hawaii resident.

    In these islands what you bring to the table is more important than where you come from. If you are good hearted, friendly, honest, and fair in your dealings with others you are as family. If not, you will be kept at bay at the least. The local social consensus shuns arrogant, aggressive, and competitive "me first" personalities and with good cause. These islands are small and isolated. Living here happily requires harmonious cooperation with those around you. It's the only way generations of Hawaiian, Asian and other immigrant groups survived… because their culture valued the needs of the collective over the individual. This element is at the heart of the culture in these islands and part of the reason @Hwhy we outsiders are drawn here. We seek to reconnect with what we have relinquished in our attempts to reach the "summit"…Yes, Hawaii is chok full of natural, exotic beauty but without the richness of culture its jst another beautiful place. If you are having a difficult time here try to keep in mind that by the end of it all the "aloha" spirit will reign supreme. This land supports that naturally.

    Of course there are always a few who will take things too far. However, they are the minority. If you are finding that you are falling prey to racist attitudes more often than not, you might want to check your own attitude to figure out what keeps attracting this type of interaction to you. Many people of caucasian ancestry have lived in these islands for decades and have been adopted into this community. One major difference that I notice between them and those with complaints is attitude. The former appreciate not only the land, and cultural materal, but it's PEOPLE as well. They acknowledge that this land truly is the homeland of a people and make attempts to get to know who those people are. They dont sweat it every time they're rejected nor think its always due to race. They recognize an order to the way people live here and adapt to it rather than expecting others to bend to their expectations.

    If you can relate to others on a human level,meaning exclusive of the stuff(job,kind of car you drive, education,where you live, etc.) we mainlanders like to identiy ourselves by, you should have little to worry about. If your main motivation for linking up with others is to obtain social priviledge you might become disillusioned.

    All in all it may be of value for one to have to sit on the other side of the racial fence every once in a while to fully appreciate one's humaness… If youre gracious you may find that we are all equally flawed, yet beautiful, resilient, and deserving. To know this means you are blessed. The lesson of humility is understandably not a pleasant one though.

    As far as the bullying in schools, its common everywhere? Why should Hawaii be the exception? Kids are kids even in Hawaii. Many come from challenging family backgrounds and the newcomers are usually white and middle classed. The socioeconomic gap is glaring. But even the non-caucasian immigrants catch hell if they are of the priviledged class. This is the root issue. Of course local youth can become riled enough to express anger over this and latch on to who stands out the most. Especially, considering that Hawaii's history of interaction with economically priviledged newcomers has not been mutually beneficial. Regardless, these kids are still learning the proper way to be in this world- cut them a break. Moreover, it is not useful to judge a group based on the actions of a few of it's members.

    • Thank you, another intelligent response. I'm sure that some of the bullying is based on pure ignorance: kids bullying other kids just because they see the white skin. However, from my public school experience, it was exactly what you were saying. Lots of haole kids got by just fine. The new ones from the mainland that showed up with this "I know everything, I'm better than you" attitude where the ones that really got in trouble. That, and the children of military parents. I'm not saying all military children are ill adapted, but is it outrageous to think that a child's social skills suffer a little when they have to pick up and make new friends every three years?

    • Hope you are still around Alohane after posting 27 weeks ago.
      Your 2nd. paragraph seems to reflect the conflict Mich & Michael Golojuch Jr. have with Christian churches. They seem to ignore that churches have adapted into this community, appreciate the culture, land, & people. Attempt to get to know who we are, & don't sweat it when sued by this family.
      The golojuchs seem to hate Christian churches. See the lawsuits @ Lawsuit claims churches owe state money
      By Web Staff reported on, August 16, 2013 https://www.khon2.com/2013/08/15/lawsuit-claims-ch

    • Kids bully kids everywhere. That's one thing, but administrators allowing severe beatings by children with no punishment for the bullies ever? That's ridiculous. Why would people say that school administrators are allowing and participating in violent brutal attacks of children on children? What is their motivation to say such things? A friend of mine told me personally of a seriously racist encounter on Kauai with some clown attacking two tourists. Hawaiians are a bunch of drunk welfare mooches.

      Whereever people get a free ride, their characters drop into the basement. It's just a truth about all humans, same for whites, blacks, mexicans and hawaiians. You get a free ride, and you turn into an envious, drug taking, child-having, uneducated loser. Here's a hint for you morons: White colonialism didn't benefit ALL whites morons. You're 25% of the population. Either get breeding and take over or zip it. And get ready to eject all the asians, because they're running your lives as much as anyone, but you're just too inebriated to see it.

      Of course parents allow their children to harass white children – it's the best way to make whites leave the islands, makes perfect sense. But good luck making the JHapanese, go, hawaiians. They won't play with you like the whites do. They'll just take over your islands, and then you'll see the Chinese show up, and game over. The Japanese are going to need HI anyway, since they've already irradiated their own islands with that garbage nuclear power.

      • Well said. I've lived in other states but grew up in Hawaii….the bullying there was worse than any other I've seen. My sister's life was threatened, my brother was beat up- severely broken nose, ribs and leg, I was tortured daily by students AND teachers. That is not "normal childhood bullying". If this was being done to black kids, we'd see it in the news and there would be laws enacted….in Hawaii, it's called just another day.

        To those saying you get what you give, fuck you. I was a sweet, quiet child who was regularly harassed, hurt, chastised, threatened, attacked and abused. It made me a terrified, sensitive person who has PTSD from the trauma I endured. It taught me to hate the locals, to have nothing but anger and bitterness towards them.

        You don't know what hate is until you go to school with locals in Hawaii. They are the epitome of evil and teach their kids to be even worse.

  6. When one really observes it, the anti-haole bullies are usually the ones with the least amount of Hawaiian blood. Most of them have haole blood and are offspring of multi-ethnic parents. They are very confused. Always have been. You'd think they would have voted for Hawaiian blood for Governor, Duke Aiona. But no, they all voted for a Haole transplant from New York, Neil Abercrombie. No doubt, this must add to the cognitive dissonance of local "hawaiian" (one drop all you need!!) bullies.

  7. so now white people I am glad you all going through that now you know how we minorities feel in usa mistreated and discriminated you always saying to black people gett over it there's no racism now that you all experienced now you know that indeed it does exist

    • …and this is why White people are hated all over the world. Haoles like this ruin it for everyone else.

    • What!!!! Who u calln The N word hope not us Hawaiians

      If u r then your just like the rest that Judge the whole hawaiian

      Race for a few bad Hawaiians… First of I’d like to say the things I in counterd with

      Whites : first no respect …u can’t jus come to hawaii

      And expect its gonna be ok understand our land was stolen

      From us from whites …that’s similar as if u took our child

      raised her as your own but don’t truly belong to you…you see what I’m saying

      Now ? Ok how’s this one “Jesus ” is not American he is Jerusalem but

      Yet about 99.9% Americans pray to Jesus u take bits and pieces of cultures n make it

      Your own n u can’t say u was so friendly to ask for it. U know what nuff said

      There’s more but I know it’s best to forgive I rather live then hate

    • Wow now that is really sad. That being said there is no race issue with blacks except within the black community. They want a race issue gives SOME of them an excuse to never better their lives. I grew up in California land of the weirdos and freaks. Trust me i don't blink twice at anyone. All that being said you sound completely uneducated, and ignorant. I call it like I see em. The people of Hawaii that are educated don't think like you, I know plenty of them. Go back to school in your case it would be good for the soul.

  8. All is good I'm moving over to the big island this year my 9-year-old is coming over with me I have had him in martial arts classes three days a week starting at age 4 I fill sorry for any bully that try's to pic on him lets see how we'll that works for him lol

    • Please let us know how it works for him lol. I'm sure he'll be the first to ever know martial arts in Hawaii, as I'm sure their has never been any local martial arts fighters from Hawaii that participated in the UFC taking on some of the best mainland fighters.

      So yes your kid should have no problem being the Island's toughest kid, lol, lol, lol

      You might want to start training in martial arts also so when the other kids parents want to talk to you lol.

  9. I was in fourth grad back in the late 50's. My father was a naval aviator stationed at Barber's Point on Oahu. My well-intentioned parents sent us to Sacred Hearts Academy run by the Sisters of the Sacred Hearts. Sister Veronica, of "ethnic" decent, seemed to get her jollies from persecuting the white kids (most of them children of the military, like myself). She even had a row in the classroom designated "the pig pen" One of her pet peeves was a kid asking to go to the rest room during class. When once, I could hold it no longer, I ventured up to her desk and asked (since the non-haole girl that had asked the day before got away with it). She dragged me out of class to the coat closet at the end of the lanai, pulled up my skirt and gave me a spanking! Since my own parents had never raised a hand against me, I was mortified. What did my parents do? Nothing, they never knew. I was too ashamed to tell them. I held this incident in my child's heart for years. I'm just telling this now because you gave me a forum. Few nuns are bad, of course, neither are Hawaiians. I'm definitely not the only child to be abused by the clergy. I'm sure Sister Veronica was abused by her parents (given the stories she used to tell). I'm sure she died years ago, and so did all the rest who presided there at the time – I just hope someone there hears this a feels just a little bit bad. I also hate all the racial slurs from some of the people who wrote in to comment on this column. Please don't associate me with their hatred – no matter what the reason.
    ….and yes, I know how minorities feel. Should I thank Sister Veronica for that????

  10. I live on the Westside rite out of Waianae born and raised here no one

    Is perfect but the white culture has more wrong doings around the world

    To other cultures Then a handful of Hawaiians on an island with a few wrong

    Doings to whites. think about it how many bombs u dropped how

    Many people killed how many problems u bout to the islands

    Think about it Hawaiians never new what the word “nigger” was until

    It was introduced to us from the white culture

Comments are closed.